SC:
- to use descriptive language to help the reader visualise the setting
- to use language that activates the readers’ senses e.g smell and sound
- to use similes and metaphors to describe the setting
- to use interesting vocab to describe the setting
Walking through the doors. Hearing the doors sounds go “ding dong.” The smell drifted under my nose. The strong smell of animal food surrounded me. The cute little kittens ran around in there little cages like crazy children on to much sugar. Birds in their cages chirping to the music that was in the background. Puppies were fast asleep on one another. Walking around the aisles, hearing the toys getting squeaked. Watching the kids run around the store going “look mummy look how cute the animals are, can we get one?” Walking down the aisle stood fish tanks the faint sound of the bubbles bubbling in the tank......
Comment: I really enjoyed reading your story because it was easy to find out what the scene was and you described everything well.
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